At first, it seems endearing that he wants to spend more time with you and asks that you skip a lunch with a friend or family member so as to hang out with him.

Nevertheless, as time passes and he demands ever more of your time, it is no longer endearing but toxic.

It’s no longer a lunch with a friend or family member he wants you to cancel so as to hang out with him, but birthdays, anniversaries, weddings, baby showers, etc.

He wants you to stay with him and only him, whether it be at home or out on the town.

A toxic relationship can sneak up on you.

What once seemed endearing and sweet reveals itself to be toxic.

A sign of a toxic relationship is when control is at the center of it.

He is keeping you from seeing your friends and family in person, as well as keeping you from talking to them over the phone.

If not for seeing your posts on social media, several of them would report you as missing to the police given how little they get to see and hear of you.

The moment he tells you to not go meet a friend or family member for an activity and rather stay with him, this is already a potent sign that more of this controlling behavior is to come.

It isn’t endearing.

A guy who is excited about you in the early stages won’t stop you from seeing someone you love for lunch or some other activity.

Instead, he respects your time with them and sets up plans to see you that upcoming weekend.

Furthermore, a toxic boyfriend doesn’t like to hear your opinion.

He laughs it off and ridicules it.

This is done so that you get to a point where you are no longer giving your opinion.

Fundamentally, he molds you into someone who no longer thinks for herself.

At first, when he ridicules or makes a joke out of an opinion you give, it comes off as good-natured mocking.

Nonetheless, this isn’t a good sign.

No guy who genuinely likes you wants to nor takes pleasure in ridiculing an opinion you give.

If anything, he is excited about hearing what you have to say about matters that are compelling or interesting.

A guy who ridicules an opinion you give and gets away with it will continue to do it until you no longer want to give an opinion for fear of being ridiculed.

This renders you mute, giving him all the leverage when it comes to decision-making.

You become his sidekick, going along with his opinions so as to avoid being diminished.

This is toxic.

Additionally, this is someone who incorporates insults into how he talks to you.

Not only are you no longer comfortable with giving an opinion, your self-esteem is further diminished by his harsh insults.

Once again, this kind of toxicity sneaks up on you.

It starts with minor insults that seem innocuous.

For instance, he gives you a lighthearted insult in reference to how you misspelled a word in a text message you sent to him.

You take it in stride, not knowing that he has planted the first seed.

The insults increase over time and become more profound.

Since you are becoming more emotionally invested in the relationship, you let these insults pass or don’t make too much of them.

You want to believe he is emotionally invested in you too, and there is a fear that if you were to call him out on his insults, you could anger him and potentially lose him.

Before you know it, he is outwardly insulting you, whether it be in private or in public.

At the heart of every toxic relationship is control.

One partner is too insecure and wants to control the other.

He molds you into what he wants you to become and uses you as a tool to offload all of his personal trauma.