In the majority of long-term relationships, complacency sets in.

Both parties become comfortable with each other.

To such a level that one or both begin to let themselves go.

In long-term relationships, at least one partner has let themselves go and gained excessive weight.

Unfortunately, you are currently facing this predicament.

You love your girlfriend, but she has let herself go in such a way that it has affected how you see her as someone you were once immensely physically attracted to.

To date, you’ve lost a massive amount of physical attraction for her.

Every time she wants to be physically intimate with you, getting yourself in the mood is nigh impossible.

This has affected her to such an extent she has cried herself to sleep.

It’s not like all of this happened overnight.

You saw that she was letting herself go a while back and did what you could to keep it from happening.

There was never a slackening in the quality of foods you kept in your home.

These are healthy foods stored and cooked.

Trips to the gym are an almost daily occurrence, and you have repeatedly encouraged her to come with you.

The people you have in your life as friends live a healthy lifestyle too, which means that any time she is hanging out with you and them, she is surrounded by positive role models.

Despite all of this sustained effort on your part, she never keeps up with her promises to get back in shape.

She tells you that she knows she is gaining weight and that she will get back to eating healthy and going to the gym.

This never lasts.

Within a few days, she is back to eating unhealthy and stops going to the gym.

Being that you love her, you have stayed with her for all this time as you have watched her go from a woman you were genuinely physically attracted to and into one you no longer want to be physically intimate with.

Regrettably, you are now at a point where you are thinking about breaking up with her in a way you never had in the past.

For quite a while, you have been weighed down by a deep sadness and a powerlessness triggered by how much she seems incapable and unwilling to keep from letting herself go.

You desperately miss who she used to be when she was physically fit.

She was more outdoorsy too, happy to go on a run or biking with you.

Now, she wants to stay home.

It’s clear that her self-esteem has greatly diminished since she gained all this weight.

She doesn’t even want to come out to hang out with friends at a local lounge like she used to.

It’s as though she is ashamed of what she looks like and would much rather stay home and watch her favorite reality TV show.

In a situation like yours, you are better off breaking up with her.

It’s only going to get worse.

You have already tried over a sustained period of time to get her to lose weight through leading by example.

You cook and eat healthy, go to the gym, participate in outdoorsy activities, have health-conscious friends with healthy eating habits, etc., and none of this has influenced her to change her unhealthy eating habits for good and lose the weight.

Sadly, she is bound to keep gaining the weight.

As aforementioned, people become complacent in relationships, which often means that both or at least one of the partners lets themselves go.

In your particular case, it’s your girlfriend.

Alas, you can’t force her to do something she clearly doesn’t have the heart to do.

And as her weight continues to climb, you will only become that much more unattracted to her and resentful that she has chosen to let herself go when you have been diligent in maintaining your physical fitness throughout the relationship.

Breaking up with her frees you from the emotional shackles you have no doubt been laden with.

It hasn’t felt like you have had a girlfriend for a while, but rather, an overweight friend you begrudgingly sleep with from time to time whenever she complains about the lack of physical intimacy.

A relationship shouldn’t feel like a burden or a chore.

It should be joyful.

And sadly, you haven’t felt joy in a good long while.