There has been constant disappointment in your dating history.

You meet men that seem promising at first, but the courtships fizzle out.

This has occurred often enough to give you the impression that there is a flaw about you that ultimately turns guys off.

A guy goes from showing an initial interest to no longer wanting to talk to you or hang out.

With this in your dating history, it is no wonder that you now believe that you will never be loved romantically.

Sadly, you have developed a mentality that you aren’t deserving of love, believing that there is a deficiency in who you are as a person that makes you undesirable to men.

You have drawn this conclusion based on a number of bad previous engagements with men that were seemingly interested in you at the start.

Once the mentality that you aren’t deserving of love develops, your self-esteem is significantly affected.

With this mentality, you surmise that there is no point in continuing to try.

Ergo, you stop trying.

There is a solace in this.

You are no longer putting yourself out there socially, risking yet another disappointing interaction with a guy you meet at an event.

When you stop trying, you no longer risk taking an emotional pummel every time a courtship with a guy doesn’t work out.

You get to uncomplicate your life when you stop trying.

Instead of going out on a Friday night to a social event, you stay home instead.

This saves you from all the work that comes with going out.

You don’t have to spend an unruly amount of time applying makeup, looking for an outfit to wear, airbrushing or straightening out your hair, sitting in traffic in your car on your way to a social event, etc.

Rather, you are home in your PJs eating ice cream and catching up on your favorite reality TV show.

This type of lifestyle is so easy to fall into and make a routine.

As human beings, we are naturally inclined to choose the path of least resistance.

We aren’t exactly champing at the bit to do what is inconvenient or difficult.

Spending weekend after weekend at home, as opposed to going through the trouble of venturing out to a social event, becomes so easy to get used to.

That said, we do eventually come to a point where we desire companionship.

That ice cream tastes delicious, but it isn’t as satisfying as kissing the soft lips of a guy you are into.

That reality show is entertaining, but it isn’t as fun as spending the night hanging out with a guy you are into.

In due course, a human desire for a romantic connection with someone else becomes the prevalent thought process in your mind.

The reason why you are now at a stage where it feels wrong to no longer be dating, or putting yourself out there, has to do with a recent craving for this human connection.

Since you are having these thoughts, the good news is that you aren’t emotionally closed off to romance and love.

You want romance and love in your life.

To achieve this, believe that you are someone worth loving.

This means that building up your self-esteem, and by so doing, your confidence, is required.

To build up your self-esteem, set goals for yourself and immediately take action to achieve them.

Start with smaller goals.

Smaller goals are easier to achieve.

On a personal level, setting a smaller goal to lose a pound a week through diet and exercise, or a professional goal to acquire more knowledge in a particular area of expertise by reading up on it for an hour or two when you get home from work, is realistic.

When you accomplish a small goal, it gives you more confidence to go after a bigger goal.

When you succeed in achieving a bigger goal, you develop more confidence to go after an even bigger goal.

Do this systematically over a sustained period of time, and your self-esteem and confidence gradually blossom.

This leads to you giving off an energy of someone who loves herself and knows she is worth dating.

With this mentality, you are ready to head out on Friday nights again.

At social events, you are attracting guys to you like moths to a flame.

These guys don’t get bored and lose interest in you soon after choosing to court you.

They stick around, enamored by your confidence and active lifestyle, all of which they can’t get enough of.