There is a difference between becoming a better person for the benefit of yourself and your relationship, versus completely changing your persona or identity in a relationship, solely for the benefit of your partner.

Becoming a better person for the benefit of yourself and your relationship is the healthier part.

Being in a relationship is a rewarding experience, when done right.

It gets rid of loneliness and opens you up to a partner that can teach you lessons about life that you have never been exposed to.

You get enlightened on certain topics or ideas in a fashion you were oblivious to.

Thanks to this, you get to pick up new healthy habits from your partner that facilitates in you enjoying life in a more fulfilling fashion.

This new insight on life not only makes you a better person, but it makes you a better partner.

Regardless of whether the relationships lasts or not, you gain beneficial personal qualities that enhances your life experience.

This is the healthiest approach to changing yourself.

It benefits you, and as a consequence, benefits your partner in a relationship.

Sometimes, a partner in our lives give us the impetus to make changes to areas we have never liked about ourselves.

That partner becomes an inspiration.

When you make this change, you aren’t doing it solely for your partner’s benefit.

You are doing it for yourself, and as an improved person, your partner gets to benefit as a fortunate side effect, and the relationship thrives.

The changes you make are positive all around for everyone involved.

It is never a good approach when you are making the changes based on wanting to assuage your partner.

This is when you are only changing yourself to benefit your partner, and this is unhealthy in a relationship.

People do this when they are so intent to make their partner happy, they forget about their own happiness.

A relationship is a two-way street.

The happiness of either party is paramount.

A relationship won’t work when strictly one partner is happy.

Unfortunately, once you start down the road of only making one partner happy, that partner becomes insatiable.

It doesn’t take long before this partner makes new demands of you.

You acquiesce to please this partner, losing yet another facet of who you are as a person.

Eventually, you become someone you don’t recognize.

Your own sense of independence has been stripped and replaced by the persona of a stranger.

Getting yourself to stop making these changes on the behest of your partner becomes all but impossible.

Your partner is never satisfied, as they seek perfection in you.

The truth is, there is no such thing as perfection in relationships.

But you are too caught up in appeasing your partner that you don’t acknowledge this.

You want so badly to make your partner happy, you do whatever it takes to benefit the partner.

The partner demands more, having an insatiable need for perfection.

She doesn’t care.

The moment you make a change and appease her, this selfish partner is demanding a new one.

It never ends.

This is human nature.

Whenever she sees a happy couple walking around, she instantly compares her relationship with you with that of this happy couple.

Inevitably, she wants you to make more changes, in her selfish quest to get you to make the relationship match what she saw between the happy couple.

This is the endless spiral of misery you face when you keep changing yourself solely for the benefit of someone else in a relationship.