It is important that you are happy within yourself before finding a girlfriend. When you aren’t, you may be seeking out a girlfriend for the wrong reasons.
Using this kind of approach will typically lead to a cycle of failed relationships that could end up causing you to give up on relationships altogether.
When you are seeking out a girlfriend in order for her to make you happy, you are showing that you are not a very secure individual.
You are showing that you don’t have a strong sense of self-worth.
This kind of emotion is not healthy.
You will place so much emphasis on your girlfriend making you happy that it will put a strain on your relationship.
Your girlfriend will feel the pressure and it will be very difficult for her to cope.
She may believe that she can at first.
She may take all the attention that you are giving her as a sign that you are really interested in her and this may initially be enough for her to believe that you are someone worth being with.
A great number of people do love attention.
However, as she begins to realize that this attention is now giving way to obsession, she becomes worried.
She realizes that you are not simply seeking to share your life with her, you are seeking to be in every facet of her life.
You are seeking to be part of every decision that she makes.
You are not happy when she doesn’t return your messages immediately.
You are not happy when she forgets to send you a text.
You are not happy when she doesn’t tell you that she loves you often enough.
You are not happy when she forgets to tell you how amazing you are.
You are dependent on her approval.
You are dependent on her continuous flow of ego boosting words that will make you feel better about yourself.
You are dependent on her giving you all or most of her time.
You are not happy when she spends a significant amount of time with family or friends because you will feel neglected.
These are all signs that you are using your girlfriend to make you happy.
You are using your girlfriend to fulfill an emotional void within you.
You don’t have any real independence of your own.
You have avoided finding your real passion in life.
Instead, your passion is this girlfriend.
This is where you will fail again and again in your relationships.
A girl who likes you enough to become your girlfriend can only take so much.
She will not be happy with the fact that she has to be your everything.
Even if she is a needy girl herself, she would still get to the point where it feels like it is all about you.
Unfortunately, you may deceive yourself into believing that you aren’t the problem.
After all, you give these girls attention.
Isn’t that what they want?
There is a big difference between being attentive and being obsessive.
Find your passion in life first.
Be independently happy.
Only then should you go about finding a girlfriend.
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