You mustn’t change your personality to be a better dating prospect.
This creates discomfort and confusion within you.
It doesn’t take long for a date to uncover that you are not being your true self and you lose them.
You deceived them and they don’t take too kindly to you wasting their time and manipulating them.
In presenting someone to them that you authentically weren’t, you took them for a ride so to speak.
This is how they break up with you.
To have long-term success in dating, you have to be who you are.
Someone has to be attracted to you for who you are and not to a personality you have created.
You don’t have to change your personality to be a better dating prospect.
When it comes to your personality, take out what you don’t like about it and add better traits.
At your core, you are the same person, but you have made some positive adjustments.
This is how you approach a change of personality.
There must be facets to your personality that you like.
The facets you don’t like, get rid of them.
Make additions to your personality that are positive, but aren’t the polar opposite to who you are.
For example, you don’t like a side to your personality that isn’t outspoken.
Yet, you believe that there is so much you know that you want to share.
The challenge is in having the confidence to express it.
In this case, your core personality is knowledge.
Your handicap is your reticence to be outspoken with said knowledge.
This is where you add something to your personality so as to inject the confidence to be outspoken.
A good exercise to add this confidence is to habitually talk to strangers as you go about your day.
Although it feels intimidating at first, strangers aren’t hard to talk to.
A topic related to where you are is the smoothest conversation starter.
So, in a bus, you talk to the stranger next to you about something funny you experienced on a bus ride you had a week or so ago.
The stranger laughs.
Soon, they are relating to your story by giving you their own story on something they experienced on the bus recently.
See, it isn’t hard.
Do more of this.
Talk to strangers every day.
At a gas station, talk to the stranger on the other side who is filling their tank about how great gas prices have been of late.
Doing this exercise on a daily basis eventually makes you feel so much ease in speaking that you are now outspoken.
Here, you have added something positive to your personality without changing it to something polar opposite of who you are in the hopes you are a better dating prospect.
Remember, different people are attracted to different personality traits.
No one size fits all.
Instead of changing your personality into something you have no connection to, enhance the personality you already have by eliminating what is negative and adding what is positive that identifies with who you are as a person.
At your core, you are the same person.
You are just improved.
What you don’t want to do is inject a trait that doesn’t correlate with your personality type.
This is akin to getting a blood transfusion or organ transplant from a donor with the wrong blood type.
For example, you choose to inject intimidation or bravado into your personality where it doesn’t gel with your core personality.
You think this makes you attractive to a dating prospect.
This isn’t a good idea.
It doesn’t gel with your personality, which is softer, kinder, warmer.
Now you attract a person who likes an intimidating personality, as you wrestle internally to force this new personality trait into the core of who you are.
It doesn’t work.
It’s like receiving a blood transfusion or organ transplant from a donor with the wrong blood type.
The chaos within you is miserable and your date eventually picks up on your deceit and breaks up with you.
Is this what you want?
Of course not.
Stick to who you are.
Get the very best of DatingLogic straight to your inbox!