At this stage in your life, they believe you are old enough to get married and have kids.

They waited for you to live your life for a while, as you went to school and experienced a few years of life as an independent woman in the workforce.

While this was happening, your parents were getting older.

They are now contending with their mortality.

They know they have more days behind them than ahead of them.

Meanwhile, you are an adult who still has far more years ahead of you than behind you.

To this end, there is no sense of urgency on your part.

In fact, there is so much more in life that you want to experience and accomplish.

There are professional and financial goals you want to meet, as well as exciting places you want to visit.

Given all this, the thought of marriage and kids seems far too premature.

To be frank, you aren’t entirely certain about whether you want marriage and kids.

Your parents, on the other hand, don’t care about the life you have planned.

They care about theirs.

They are getting older and know that it is only a matter of time before sickness and old age put them at death’s doorstep.

This is why they are pressuring you with such ferocity.

They are grappling with their mortality and are deeply worried that they will die without ever having seen their biological legacy extended.

The biological legacy is evidenced in the birth of grandkids.

Sadly, no matter what you tell them about your lack of preparedness for marriage and kids, it won’t change their overwhelming desire for you to find a man for marriage and start making kids in short order.

They are too caught up in their own mortality and the abject fear that they won’t get grandchildren from you.

Rather than bouncing around the topic, give your parents a clear understanding of where you stand on marriage and kids.

Do you want marriage and kids in your future?

If you don’t, you have to be very clear about that with your parents.

This means that there can be absolutely no ambiguity.

Tell them that you have absolutely no intention of getting married and having kids in the future.

After making this completely clear, tell them that bringing the subject up again would be disrespectful to you.

Should they bring it up again in the future, politely tell them that you have already let them know your position on this topic and that you won’t engage in the conversation.

And back that up by politely walking away or ending a phone call should they continue to bring this topic up in future interactions.

This strong posture finally gets them to understand that there is no point in bringing up the topic, and they let it go.

The pressuring ends.

On the other hand, should you believe you want marriage and kids but you aren’t prepared to do that in the near future, give your parents a definitive timeline of when you intend to get married and have kids.

With a real timeline, your parents are no longer in the dark about your intentions.

Even if they aren’t happy with the timeline, they would have no choice but to accept it, especially when you proceed to no longer discuss it with them in future conversations, going as far as politely terminating a phone call or walking away during a family meetup if need be.

This timeline is nonnegotiable, and as long as you don’t waver from it, your parents are forced to accept it.

By giving them a definitive and nonnegotiable timeline, your parents naturally do the math.

They calculate their expected age at that point.

Instead of constantly pressuring you about marriage and kids, future conversation topics switch to that of health and lifestyle.

Yes, all of a sudden your parents are taking up swimming and afternoon walks.

That’s their way of staying healthy and alive long enough to finally see you get married and have kids.