If you blew your crush off twice, you should apologize as this would be the right and polite thing to do.
This being said, you really do need to figure out what your true feelings are. This has to be determined before taking any further steps with this crush.
You have to ask yourself a very important question that requires some time to ponder.
Do you truly like your crush?
You may tell yourself that you do but you should strongly consider the possibility that this is not the case.
When was the last time you blew someone off that you were truly interested in?
That is because when there is genuine interest, you generally follow through.
Do you see yourself dating this crush on a serious level?
How many real conversations have you had with this crush?
Do you even remember your conversations?
Can you actually visualize yourself dating them?
Try to do that for a second.
Try to visualize yourself dating them on a regular basis.
If that image is relatively hard for you to conjure up, that may be all you need to know that this crush is not someone that you are truly interested in.
When was the last time you thought about them independently?
In other words, they didn’t contact you first and take the initiative.
Come to think of it, when was the last time you took initiative to interact with them in any way?
Probably hard for you to remember because it hasn’t happened in a while.
In a situation like this, just get real.
Do both you and your crush a favor and politely let this one go.
Being truly honest with yourself about all this will work a lot better than being dishonest.
It would also be a lot less stressful for you.
It will be beneficial to the both of you because you will not be leading your crush on and you on the other hand can move on to someone you truly like.
Moving on to someone that you truly like is the best result for you and may give your crush an opportunity to focus attention on someone else who may truly like them.
This way, you don’t end up wasting your time and that of your crush.
Wasting time wouldn’t be beneficial to either one of you.
By wasting time, you would only be depriving yourself of someone that may be a much better match for you.
You would also be allowing yourself to remain in a very confused state of mind.
Perhaps after a while you begin to convince yourself that your crush is indeed the person that you want to be with.
However, yet again, you doubt yourself and blow off your crush.
Due to your mixed signals, your crush may start developing feelings for you until they are unfortunately left heartbroken.
This is not the state of mind you want to put anyone in nor do you want to be that person who plays with the feelings of others.