All you want is to be there for him.

To support him.

He pushes you away nonetheless.

He retreats, not answering your phone calls, or responding to your messages.

You are completely shut out, as he pushes you away.

This hurts you deeply, being that you want to be there for him when he is clearly going through something difficult.

In pushing you away, you are left feeling rejected, worried, and confused.

You have a belief that this must have something to do with how men are expected by society to “man up” and show no emotion or accept help.

But besides this, you are curious as to why men do this.

Men do this for a number of reasons.

Ego is one.

A fierce internalization that he is capable of fixing the difficulty without external help from whoever he is dating.

And yes, as you suspected, there are those who want to “man up” so to speak, giving in to societal pressure to show no emotion and keep it all inside.

That aside, there are men who are open to letting a woman support them during a difficult time.

These are men who have established a history of unbridled openness and trust in the relationship he has with the woman.

Think back on the relationship you have with this guy.

Has your relationship so far been one of unbridled openness and trust?

Openness like this comes about when either party has practiced unbridled open communication since the beginning of the relationship, never letting a week go by without checking in on each other and talking about what they are thinking and feeling.

What is shared at first isn’t that substantive.

There is talk about work or pop culture.

As time goes on, the open conversations naturally segue into deeper themes.

Soon, he is opening up to you about his childhood, deepest fears, innermost thoughts and secrets.

This unbridled openness eventually leads to deep trust.

Now that the relationship has matured, with unbridled openness in lockstep, the man trusts you with everything, and looks forward to talking to you about his thoughts and emotions around different topics each and every week.

When you don’t do this type of work with a guy you are dating beforehand, it’s highly unlikely that he lets you support him when he is going through something difficult.

If you want to stop a pattern of dating men who retreat when they are going through something difficult, work on building unbridled openness and trust in your relationship with him first.

Working on unbridled openness and trust pays dividends in the long run.

By the time a difficult incident occurs, he has already become acclimated to sharing his thoughts and emotions with you on a weekly basis.

His emotional intelligence has soared while he has been dating you.

This has him sharing everything with you, without any prompting from you, when he is going through something difficult.

In the end, the good news is that you don’t have to keep going through the sadness of dating men who retreat when they are going through a difficult time.

There are men who won’t retreat, as long as he has developed a strong relationship of unbridled openness and trust with you beforehand.