Reassurance is a big part of relationships.
Asking for reassurance means that you care about the relationship and where you both stand.
There has to be trust in a relationship and asking for reassurance helps to maintain it.
Now, this being said, it isn’t healthy to have to ask for reassurance constantly.
That is insecurity.
If you are having to ask for reassurance on multiple occasions, there is something wrong with your relationship.
Something that isn’t being addressed.
Asking for reassurance every once in a while is how you two verbally communicate that you are seeing eye to eye.
There is nothing wrong with this.
However, having to ask for reassurance every single time you two are together is a sign that there is something about your relationship that makes you insecure.
It’s an underlying issue that hasn’t been resolved.
What is it that is causing you to incessantly ask for reassurance?
What is your partner doing or not doing that is compelling you to incessantly ask for reassurance?
These are questions you have to ask yourself and ask about the relationship.
Whatever it is that causes you to ask for reassurance so much is the source of the problem.
For example, do you get anxious when you don’t hear from your partner for long stretches of time during the day?
In these moments, are you consumed with the fear that he is cheating on you?
This fear could be occurring because you have dated a guy in the past who did this to you or because you are currently dating a guy who has either cheated on you in the past or has done so in his previous romantic relationships.
This is where the insecurity is coming from and it must be addressed.
Have a conversation with your partner and let him know about your insecurity.
As a unit, come up with measures to mitigate this fear.
A solution could be as simple as getting your partner to agree to send you a quick text every few hours or so during the course of his day.
That quick text alleviates your anxiety without you having to stress yourself out worrying that he is up to no good.
A solution is vital.
Without a solution, your imagination can take you into a tailspin and by the time you get to see him when he gets home, you are filled with assumptions about what he was doing for those hours you didn’t hear from him.
Before you know it, you are making accusations of him that are unfair, forcing him to defend himself.
These fights hurt your relationship over time.
They kill trust and you become an emotional wreck consumed with suspicion.
A relationship like this is doomed to fail.
This is why talking about the issue and coming up with a solution is imperative.
Without a solution, asking for reassurance all the time leads to bigger fights in the future.
The sooner you come up with a solution and execute, the less likely you keep incessantly asking for reassurance.
This is conducive to a healthy, long-lasting relationship.
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