You should let your girlfriend know that her words hurt you. This isn’t one of those situations where you should simply grin and bare it. Doing that will only exacerbate the situation.
When she argues with you, she may be trying to gain an upper-hand in the relationship. She may feel like this is the best way for her to feel better about herself.
This is even more likely if those arguments tend to be based off very frivolous things.
When she seemingly argues over just about anything, she is really trying to dominate the relationship.
When people do this, it is often because they feel deficient about something else in their own lives. They will say hurtful words and argue as much as possible because they feel that by so doing they will be able to feel better than you, while putting you down.
This is a very selfish thing to do in a relationship. You can’t have a healthy meaningful relationship with someone when they are constantly putting you down in order to feel better about themselves.
A healthy relationship requires that both partners truly make an effort to respect each other and value each other’s happiness equally.
Hence, your first task must be to let her know how you feel. Again, you can’t just grin and bare this hoping that things will change. A lot of guys make this mistake.
They will allow their girlfriend to say harsh words and argue with them over and over while taking it in stride.
They don’t voice how they feel about said words or said acts. The problem with this is that though they may think that they can handle it, damage is being done.
That damage is psychological. They may not be aware of it at first but every time their girlfriend says these harsh words, it affects their sense of self-esteem.
There is only so much verbal abuse a human being can take before they start feeling really unhappy with themselves and start questioning their own self-worth.
Thereby, the longer you allow this to go on, the harder your self-esteem and sense of self-worth will falter. The danger of this is that you could wait so long to address this problem that by the time you feel that you should, you will be frozen.
Why would you be frozen?
You would be frozen because after having been at the bitter end of all those harsh words and arguments, you have lost a strong sense of who you are and your own dignity. As a result, you would be simply too afraid to address it.
This is a place you never want to get to.
Take a very strong stance on this right now and make it your mission to talk to your girlfriend about how you feel about all this. Do this today. Don’t wait. Don’t try to justify waiting by telling yourself that things will get better and she will change.
As long as you allow her to keep getting away with this, nothing is going to change.
You have to attack this problem head on while you still feel a sense of strength and self-respect. This is the only way you may be able to convince her of what she is doing and how that is affecting you. If she truly values your relationship, she may heed your concerns.
If she doesn’t and continues to say harsh words and argue excessively, you are better off leaving her.
The last thing you want is for her to affect your psyche so harshly while you were in a relationship with her that it now negatively affects how you approach your future relationships.
It’s crucial that you don’t allow yourself to stay in this kind of toxic environment.
No matter how much you love her, she clearly doesn’t love you in a healthy way.
Her words prove that.
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