He is complacent.
This happens a lot when two partners have been together for a while.
Your boyfriend doesn’t think he has to put the effort into the relationship anymore.
He believes that he has already done that, and as a consequence, has earned not having to put effort into the relationship anymore.
He put effort into the relationship in the early months or years, but that has changed.
It’s troubling, but this is a philosophy that a lot of people have when they have been in a relationship for a while.
Instead of thinking about how to make the relationship better, they are thinking that they have done enough.
This is never good and you mustn’t let this stand.
A boyfriend who has this mindset of having earned his complacency in the relationship, is putting your relationship with him on the precipice of extinction.
It’s a relationship that is on life support.
This instantly lets you know that you mustn’t ignore this.
Don’t brush it aside assuming that he changes.
Whatever you forgive, is what persists.
As long as you tolerate this, he won’t change.
It only gets worse.
A change is pivotal, and it starts with you.
Be the example.
If you are honest with yourself, you have dropped the ball on the relationship too.
You haven’t been putting effort into the relationship as you once did.
It is not a good enough excuse to say that you haven’t been putting effort into the relationship due to your boyfriend’s behavior.
Have you stopped making plans to do activities, leaving that to your boyfriend?
Do you remember the last time you planned an activity?
You are half the relationship.
This means that it is half your responsibility to maintain a robust relationship.
Make plans to do activities with your boyfriend.
Don’t leave that responsibility solely on him.
Leaving this responsibility solely on him hasn’t been working and it’s time for a different strategy.
Organize activities with him, and don’t let any grumbling or resistance from him deter you.
There are consequences for a boyfriend who chooses to stay home and play video games over going out on an activity you have made plans to partake in.
He won’t get to enjoy boyfriend privileges.
That means it won’t be a given that you give him sex that night or any other night for that matter.
A boyfriend who isn’t putting effort into the relationship hasn’t earned boyfriend privileges.
Continuing to sleep with him rewards bad behavior, taking away the urgency to repair what is pushing this relationship closer and closer to a cliff.
Put your foot down.
He has to partake in these activities, if he expects to continue enjoying his boyfriend privileges.
The hope is that he learns from your example and eventually takes the initiative in organizing activities to do with you on his own volition.
A boyfriend who never gets to where he takes the initiative is too far gone, and that means that there is no saving your relationship.
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