Your job is not to make him feel loved.
This fixation isn’t good.
A guy who has emotional or psychological issues isn’t going to feel loved no matter how hard you work at it, without getting professional help first.
Before anything else, determine whether the issue goes deeper than what you see on the surface.
Does he have constant mood swings?
Does he have a strained or estranged relationship with family members who have shown him nothing but love?
Does he repeatedly avoid affection?
When these are in effect, he needs professional help.
Avoid putting it on yourself to free him from these issues.
That’s above your pay grade.
In the event he doesn’t encapsulate any of these, then there is hope that your individual efforts make a difference.
Instead of fixating on making him feel loved, buckle down on showing him your appreciation.
In other words, show him that you don’t take him for granted.
For example, a simple thank you on a regular basis has an amazing effect.
This is how you show appreciation.
In detecting that you appreciate him, he feels loved.
So much of this is predicated on him realizing that you are acknowledging all the good he is doing for you in the relationship.
Voicing your appreciation is great, but follow that up with returning the favor.
Buy him those tickets to see his favorite rock band at concert.
Help him fix his motorbike.
Cook him his favorite meal.
Buy him a jersey of his favorite football team.
Return the favor, but don’t go overboard.
Making him feel loved doesn’t equate to drowning him with acts of love and appreciation.
There has to be an even balance in how much you both give.
Remember, the little acts are just as credible as the big ones.
He doesn’t have to fix your boiler for you to show appreciation.
It’s a quiet day on the weekend and you are both lazying about the house, you verbally thank him for walking the dog or give him a quick kiss on the lips or forehead for washing the dishes.
Acknowledge him when he holds the door open for you, picks lint off your blouse, puts the toilet seat down, checks the air pressure on your tires, leaves you the lion’s share of clothing space in the closet, etc.
These small acts add up over time.
Acknowledging them and showing appreciation gives him the impression you value what he does and yes, reassures him that you don’t take him for granted.
Take advantage of periods when you are apart.
Send him a text on something that you know makes him smile.
Doesn’t have to be a romantic note.
It’s a photo or text quote.
You leave it at that and move on with your day.
Show gratitude and appreciation regularly.
In time, he realizes that this change in behavior wasn’t a fluke, as you have repeatedly returned the favor in big and small acts.
Naturally, his guard goes down as he comes to expect this from you.
Greater rapport has been established.
Soon, he is feeling loved without much internal pushback whatsoever.
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