Having parents that are verbally and physically abusive is a negative influence in your life.
This affects you emotionally.
You have struggled with having to deal with this abuse through childhood and into adulthood.
This has significantly kept you from opening yourself up to dating someone with long-term relationship potential.
You have purposely dealt with romantic prospects as short-term dalliances, knowing that the verbal and physical abuse of your parents is constantly looming over your head.
Now you want more out of your love life.
You want a serious long-term partner.
This has you thinking about your verbally and physically abusive parents.
You purposely got into short-term interludes with romantic prospects so that you would never get serious enough with them to have to introduce them to your parents.
Now that you want to have a healthy long-term relationship with a woman, it’s inevitable that she is going to want to meet your parents.
The thought of introducing your verbally and physically abusive parents to a girl you love, and the trauma you would be inviting into her life by having your parents as her possible future in-laws, is frightening to you.
You have good reason to be worried about the negative short-term and long-term effects of having such abusive parents in your life, and that of a future partner.
It is no wonder that you are thinking about whether you should cut off contact with your parents before dating someone.
This keeps you from never having to contend with having to introduce her to your parents and having her go through the type of abuse you went through at their hands.
It’s been years and your parents are still verbally and physically abusive.
This means that they aren’t changing.
This is who they are.
The older that people get, the harder it is to change oneself.
Being verbally and physically abusive is what they know.
It is as much a part of them as their DNA.
Even if, on the outset, they seem to be kind to whoever you introduce to them as your partner, this won’t last long.
Old habits die hard.
It is only a matter of time before their abusive tendencies rise to the surface.
This would have a profoundly negative effect on your relationship with her.
Before you know it, she is fighting with you about what was said or done to her by your abusive parents.
It was hurtful.
She is crying over it, and blaming you for putting her in such a negative predicament with your abusive parents.
Children have a propensity to emulate their parents.
Given that their parents were who they learned from growing up, they develop the same character traits as said parents.
Thankfully, you have chosen not to be like your parents.
Being that your parents have never changed their verbally and physically abusive proclivities, it would be too risky to bring someone that you care about into this situation.
As aforementioned, you run a risk of creating tension within your own relationship when you expose her to such abuse.
It’s alright to cut off a great deal of contact with your parents before dating someone that you intend to make a long-term partner.
Nevertheless, do check in on them from time to time for very brief moments.
They are your parents after all.
That being said, never expose anyone you are seriously dating to their abusive influence.