What happened here?

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    Today something happened in my daily commute that does not usually happens to me.

    I was standing and this girl was sitting, I first caught her looking at me, and our eyes meet, and she turned her face away smiling. I did not smile back at her.

    The I grabbed, the news paper, then my phone, and tried to restrain from overthinking that, as in my experience sometimes this happens and I never go for it as in commute we have not many places to look at, so eyes cross with a lot of people.

    Then I noticed her gaze on me, our eyes meet again, and she turned away smiling the same way, and kind of looking to the surroundings, this time probably she became uncomfortable, as my reaction was all the same, no smiling back.

    Then came the little minutes I traveled sitting, the sitting spot was to her side, I restrained from the temptation of removing my earplugs and talking to her, and tried to distract my eyes on everything else, the trip was after all almost at an end.

    Then I looked into the widow on the other side, there she was looking into my hand and legs (I was kind of moving myself with the music, LOL, as I usually do, to distract from the trip) then, she looked into my face from the side, maybe she noticed I was gazing from the window and she turned and our eyes meet in the reflection for a third time, she lightly smiled again and looked down.

    My trip was over, as I left, I could see on the corner of my eye she followed me leaving with her eyes.

    Honestly, I felt a lot of willingness to talk to her. But as I am not kind of person to go for a talk because of eye contact, and absolutely, I would not smile to a person just for the sake of smiling (in my opinion that would be dumb of me, I understand people do it and are OK with it, but in my own personal standards, its just dumb), even if and when I find that person interesting to the look.

    Probably I am missing all the chances I ever got to meet new people, specially new girls. But it is just unbearable to me to play that kind of game (I feel uncomfortable and like throwing myself from a bridge if I try, and believe me, I did).

    Any advise?

    Thanks in advance



    I’m a girl so I can tell you that she was probably looking at you because she found you attractive. She most likely smiled because she was cought in the act. Girls love confidence on a man, you should of said something to her because you might not ever see her again. You might be nervous or aren’t really that social, but you gotta meet new people someway. I know it’s a lot easier to talk to people with the technology that’s on the tip of our fingers, but we can’t forget the communication we are capable of having in the real world. I understand were your getting at about how eye contact can be challenging when talking to someone, but you gotta get over it somehow. So as weird as this sounds, maybe just practice in the mirror or talking to someone your close with. And I know you don’t like playing that kind of game, but somtimes you gotta play the game to get the girl.


    The thing is, from all my experience, I never saved or took notice on whatever I did, to spark or quick start the situations, meaning, I never actually dated, I just meet the person, or girl, we talk maybe chat afterwards, some common occasion assemble us in the same place or we agree to meet for a coffee or something… as far as I remember.

    The only time in my life I actually invited a girl for something that my resemble a date was in my early teens (13/14) and it was an utter disaster, fake, superficial, boring and the poor girl had to endure me for a full afternoon. since then (long a go) I never formally asked anyone out.

    I meet someone of my liking as I said, after talking / chatting encountering each other on random occasions, things sparked or kicked off, naturally and not with much of thinking on my part.

    You said she might have found me interesting… maybe because I look mostly alien I guess, LOL. I am not as good looking as the worst looking guy you can see in pictures of websites similar to this was.
    Confidence? Well.. its as many faces, as as far as I have read, I have none of the traditional perceived confidence guys trend to display.

    I few words my posture in public would be of someone who would not give to damns about anything around myself.
    Yeah I cross eyes, but so what? sometimes it is looking into a girl’s eyes or looking to her boobs or the guy next to me… so to keep it simple I just stare at the girls face.

    Talking with a random stranger in person and realize that all the spark in my imagination and interest that lead me to that were bluntly wrong? and taste disappointment down the throat? I don´t look forward into that.

    Well, thank you for your reply.


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