He was interested but he isn’t now

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  • #104461
    Ella
    Guest

    He was interested in me and asked me out but he always was too busy to go through w it. We did some sexual stuff but the last two times he felt guilty after and now he just wanted to be friends but I still really like him. I want to get him back but I don’t know how to go about it. We are friends but I always have to text first and he gives short replies. Advice?

    #104463
    Luke
    Keymaster

    Hi Ella,

    If he was initially interested but isn’t now, it may have something to do with where he is at emotionally at this time.

    He may not feel like he is emotionally ready to take on the responsibility of being in a relationship with you.

    That is most likely why he felt guilty after doing the sexual stuff and now just wants to be friends.

    He may worry that if he gets intimate or sexual with you, you may start developing feelings for him that he doesn’t believe he will be able to reciprocate.

    Hence, you may simply be in a situation where you are dealing with a guy who is just not emotionally available.

    In a situation like this, it would be best not to force anything.

    If you were to try forcing some kind of relationship with him, you may end up developing feelings for him that he will not be able to reciprocate.

    If you always have to text first and he only gives you short replies, you may have to start changing how you go about texting him.

    When you text him, try to go deeper.

    Ask him an open-ended question about something that you know he is very passionate about or he is highly interested in.

    Start trying to have conversations with him in this vain.

    Substantive conversations.

    Doing this may increase the likelihood that he will start texting you first.

    This could lead to him developing romantic feelings for you.

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