Fairytale relationship to disaster. Help?

[Underthehood]

I’ve been with this guy for 4years and our relationship was no less than a fairytale. Even if he would get mad he would come back to me to cheer me up. Take care of me,listened to my pointless drama acted like my best friend since I’m a very lonely person I don’t have friends. Nothing was his priority except me and he made me feel so special took away all the university stresses. Accepted me without makeup and build me up as a better person. But things started to fall apart in November 2017. He came to my house and I asked him he could share anything he wants. We always share things but for the first time he told me he got crushes on other girls despite having me and it just broke my heart. He told about a girl who likes him and keeps on staring at him. His friends even noticed. And this made me very very insecure. I asked his best friend to look up in this matter. And through his OTHWR friend we got to know he had a crush on that girl, but that girl didn’t like him. I confronted him and he admitted saying it was only attraction or he just found her beautiful and his crush ends in a week or less than three days. And I heard other things too that he has talked to this girl. But according to him it was a lie. He was really really loyal, since his ex crush, the girl who he was madly in love with came to him that she loves him and he chose me instead of her. He always solved everything and I started to depend on him completely. But ever since I got to know he got crushes I got very paranoid and we fought daily for 5 months. Eventually he stopped caring about me. I tried to commit suicide, it didn’t effect him. I even gave him option to go to his crush or chose me, he chose me over her. But eventually he started to fall out of love with me. He always said the reason was because I trusted rumors Rathee than him and fought him and toured him daily. If he used to talk to a girl, I used to get insecure and messaged the girl asking what he talked to her and kept on threatening him I have left people to spy on him in his university. Eventually he completely fell out of love. We were about to get engaged in a year or 2 but he refuses to get engaged or marry me. He doesn’t loves me or takes care of me. I tried trusting him completely and tried being a total sweet person but he feels exhausted. He doesn’t wants to talk to me or spend time with me.i love him so so so much I can’t leave him. I don’t know what to do or how to bring the old person he was. He’s gotten so cold and distant it breaks my heart. I tried talking to him about it but everytime he talks I get triggered and we end up fighting. He did comfort me its not because he likes any other girl and confirmed from few of his friends too and he even said this he only found her goodlooking. Boys do get crushes on girls despite being in relationship and for girls it’s the same I guess. I don’t know what to do or how to fix this relationship. Any advice? PS: I don’t want to breakup with him

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