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I have been with my boyfriend for three years now. He has always been very attentive. For three years almost every day he messaged me every morning and every night and checks up during the day. He is a pipeliner, we have dated while he was away at work before and we made sure to do calls or facetime beore he went to bed almost every night and if he was too tired he would tell me or shoot me a goodnight message. He was home recently for almost half a year and that time made us really close. closer than we ever were. Recently he got a job away as a pipeliner and he was good at first like always but as a couple more days went on he got busy. I tried to understand cause this job had a contract and had to be finished by a certain time so he was working alot. We got into a fight about him not staying in contact and he ended up throwing and breaking his phone. So he went four days i think without talking to me. Then he finlly fixed his phone and messaged apologizing and then said he would be home for like two days. He came home everything seemed normal. He was renting a basement suite so i helped him pack some things up to help the place be more “liveable”. Everything seemed normal then he went back to work and he has been off ever since. He barely responds to texts or eer calls me. The only text i get is him apologizing for ignoring me and that he will try to call then he never does. its the same cycle its been like this now for month and a half. I understand hes busy but all i want is a small hey im busy or hey ill try to call but im not sure. I can tell sometimed he is purposefully ignoring me. but then he texts a few days later apologizing. I just want to know what is going on in our relationship. Before he went up there he even wanted me to move there with him. I dont understand why he wont just call just to tell me if we are even together at this point cause it seems like he just has dropped off the face of the earth. I dont want to lose him if is that hes just busy with work but im going through hell wondering if maybe there is someone else. I know i should just let him be but i dont feel i can fully move forward without some sort of closure especially cause i dont want to be seen as me cheating on him. He was so perfect and this is very odd. the texts he sends apologizing are always something along the lines of ” Im so sorry Ive been so busy with work rn its the busiest time hopefully things will slow down after this weekend. I havent even showered in five days. You dont deserve this your amazing. Ill try to call you tonight”. then he never does. Im not sure if i shoud just move on or wait till he is home again and can speak face to face. Also if its worth stating, he has not added any one new on fb and while hes not speaking to me hes usually not on any social media. But sometmes he will be briefly and just not read my messages.
Hi Kianna,
He no longer values the relationship in the same way that he used to.
This new job away as a pipeliner is really no excuse not to stay in regular contact with you.
He will not end the relationship while he is away because he wants to still have a sense of security in knowing that when he gets home, he will have you to come to.
However, he has become a lot less emotionally invested in this relationship.
You should contact him and let him know that you are ending the relationship.
If you wait until he gets home again so as to speak face to face, he will only make promises in order to keep you around.
These are promises that he will most likely not keep.
Once he goes away on another pipeliner job, he may respond to your texts and call you initially.
But, as time goes on, he will fall back into ignoring your messages and making excuses about why he was too busy to call.
He has continued to show his lack of emotional investment in this relationship in the way in which he avoids reading your messages on Facebook.
Again, it is best to contact him letting him know that you are ending the relationship.
It is time for you to move on.
The longer you wait, the harder it will be.
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