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Attraction can happen in the two ways that you described.
It could just happen immediately because the girl feels something or it could be built up over time as you talk to her and show her your great personality.
There are lots of girls who start talking to guys with no real inclination or motivation as far as attraction is concerned.
However, over time, as they got to know the guy, they developed an attraction towards him.
On the flip side, there are girls who feel an instant attraction the moment they meet or see a guy.
Attraction can truly happen both ways.
With this in mind, it is important that you don’t allow the fact that a girl hasn’t shown you any signs of romantic interest as an indication that you shouldn’t talk to her or try to get her number.
There are lots of girls who are very good at hiding the fact that they may be attracted to a guy or at least, open to talking to him to see how things go.
If you see a girl that you like, talk to her anyway, regardless of whether she has shown you signs of attraction or not.
If you only focus on the girls who show you signs of attraction, you will be missing out on so much more opportunities with girls.
Yes, talking to girls who haven’t shown you clear signs of attraction increases the likelihood that you will start experiencing more rejections, but, you shouldn’t let that stop you.
It is best to take your chances and approach girls who really catch your attention, than miss out on an opportunity to date them because you are worried that they haven’t shown you any signs of interest.
Don’t take rejection personally.
Most of the time, it isn’t personal at all.
If you develop this kind of courage when it comes to talking to girls, you will find that you will have a lot more dating options in your life.