I Pick A Time And Place For A Date And Then I Cancel. Why Do I Keep Doing This And How Do I Stop?

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I Pick A Time And Place For A Date And Then I Cancel. Why Do I Keep Doing This And How Do I Stop?

You may not be emotionally ready to date anyone at this time.

You may keep making yourself believe that you are.

This may be because you have a good number of friends who are dating and you don’t want to feel like you are the odd one out.

It may be because you are typically used to being in relationships and now that you have been single for however long that it has been, you feel uneasy.

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It may even be because you genuinely want to meet this person on a date.

However, when that date draws closer, you start becoming doubtful.

You worry that the date may be awkward.

You worry that the both of you may not have that much chemistry.

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You worry that either one of you could say or do something that will turn the other off.

Due to all of this worry, you cancel the date even when you picked the time and place for it.

Think back to all the thoughts you tend to have leading up to a date that you have helped arrange.

Those range of thoughts and consequent emotions are often where you will find your answer as to why you keep doing this.

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Think back to the relationships that you have had in the past.

You most likely went out on dates with those past relationship partners before you got into a relationship with them.

What was it that made you actually follow through with going on those dates as opposed to cancelling them?

Think about that.

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There is a reason why you were able to follow through on those dates that ultimately led to relationships with your past partners.

Perhaps, the people that you have been recently talking to have not made you feel the same way your past relationship partners did when you were still in the courtship period with them.

Perhaps there is something that those relationship partners had that no one that you have been talking to in recent memory has possessed.

It may be a particular quality in personality that they had or a particular way of life that they led.

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You may be subconsciously looking for this same quality or lifestyle in the people that you are picking a time and a place for a date with and consequently cancelling on.

Perhaps you have let yourself believe that you are open to different types of people with different lifestyles.

But, you may be lying to yourself.

When you keep cancelling on these people, you may be showing that your “openness” when it comes to who you choose to date is not so open after all.

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In order to stop this kind of behavior, it would be best to ask yourself about what you truly want in a partner.

Instead of making yourself believe that you are open to whoever catches your eye, take a moment to ask yourself about the kind of qualities that you are looking for in a mate.

Also, ask yourself about whether you are emotionally ready to allow someone into your life as a relationship partner.

If you feel that you aren’t emotionally ready to date right now, take a break from it.

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Focus on yourself for a while.

On the other hand, if you feel that you are emotionally ready to date, then you would be better off focusing on only talking to people that meet the kind of qualities that you seek.

Trying to pretend that you are open to whoever catches your eye will only lead to more and more cancelled dates.


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