It is important that your boyfriend or girlfriend is a good listener and does so sincerely.
Being a good listener is a big part of what makes a relationship work.
When you are a good listener, you will make your boyfriend or girlfriend feel like they don’t only have a lover but also a friend that they can confide in.
Your partner being your friend can be very conducive to a happy and enjoyable relationship.
You should want to make your partner feel like they can come to you when they have an issue that is bothering them.
If your partner were to feel like they can’t come to you when they have an issue that is bothering them because they know that you will either not listen or show that you care, they will go to someone else.
If your partner starts confiding in someone else whenever they need someone to listen to them, they may begin to look at you as nothing more than a person that they have a physical relationship with.
Once you get to this point, your partner may begin to become more and more closed off emotionally.
This is normally when the relationship starts taking a major turn for the worse.
Eventually, your partner may want to get out of the relationship because they believe that their emotional needs aren’t being met.
This is why being a good listener in your relationship is essential.
You don’t necessarily have to give advice.
Don’t feel like you do.
The danger of believing that you have to give advice is that you may give the wrong advice or you may simply tell your partner what they want to hear.
If this were the case, you would only make matters worse.
Therefore, don’t feel like you have to give advice.
Oftentimes, just being there as a partner who is listening and who is showing affection and concern is enough.
You can be this person without putting pressure on yourself to come up with a solution to what your partner is telling you about.
Your task is to simply be there.
You can just listen and nothing more.
Now, if your partner were to ask you for advice, don’t be afraid or hesitant to tell your partner that you don’t have a solution at this time.
It is really important that you learn this.
If you truly aren’t certain of what next course to take, let your partner know that.
Your partner may actually appreciate the fact that you were being honest.
This doesn’t mean that a solution cannot come about later on.
In fact, if you choose to give advice, it is often best to allow some time to elapse before you do.
Perhaps give it day or two.
It is uncanny how a solution can come to you after the fact.
When you are still in the moment, you may feel the need to come up with advice simply because you think that this would somehow appease your partner or alleviate your partner’s anxiety.
However, you are still in the moment and may speak out of emotion.
On the other hand, when you have actually given it a day or two to think about, you are most likely going to come up with the best advice.
You would have had the opportunity to reason outside of the moment with a clearer head.
These are normally the times that you can come up with the best solutions.
Get the very best of DatingLogic straight to your inbox!