My Girlfriend Of 10 Months Wants Guy Friends Rather Than Lady Friends Because Of Less Drama. I’m Having A Hard Time Accepting It. Am I Overreacting?

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My Girlfriend Of 10 Months Wants Guy Friends Rather Than Lady Friends Because Of Less Drama. I'm Having A Hard Time Accepting It. Am I Overreacting?You are overreacting. There are quite a few girls who would rather have guy friends than lady friends.

This is what they are comfortable with. It usually comes from a bad past experience with having lady friends.

There may have been moments when those lady friends either betrayed her or spoke badly about her behind her back.

There may have been simply too much fighting about trivial issues or over-sensitivity.

This may have been her experience with having girls as friends.

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Based on this experience, she chooses to have guy friends instead because she may feel like guys are less prone to drama or talking about her behind her back.

Again, this is not the experience of every girl.

However, there are indeed women who have these kind of experiences with lady friends.

Thereby, you do need to understand that she has most likely made this decision based on the negative experiences she has had with having lady friends in the past.

It is most likely not based on just simply wanting to be the center of attention or having an endless array of possible male suitors.

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If you were to simply talk to her about her past experiences with having lady friends, she may tell you all the reasons why she has chosen to have guy friends instead.

She may give you detailed accounts of past grievances with lady friends that she has had.

If that is not enough, you could even get anecdotal accounts from her own guy friends who may be able to tell you about some of the things she has been through in the past by having lady friends.

Again, this is her experience and she is reacting to it.

There are lots of girls who have close lady friends and are able to maintain those relationships without drama.

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However, this hasn’t been her experience.

You do require a degree of understanding and reasoning here.

Try not to allow yourself to get carried away with what it looks like on the surface.

Try not to make her out to be the bad guy simply because she would rather have guy friends than lady friends.

This requires that you take a step back and look in.

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What do you see?

She has guy friends that she cares about that were there before you ever started dating her.

Do you want her to change part of what makes her function on a daily basis simply to appease your sense of insecurity?

That wouldn’t be the best move.

You would be changing who she is.

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This would only lead to despair and unhappiness.

If she is your girlfriend you are going to have to learn one of the most important ingredients that no relationship can survive without, trust.

If you simply can’t stand the thought of her having all these guy friends, she may not be the girl for you.

She wouldn’t want to lose her guy friends simply because you demand it.

If she were to do so, she would grow to detest you.

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Is that what you want?

Again, you must learn to trust if you are to make this work.

010By Luke Iwuji, a dating coach and founder of DatingLogic.net. For the best professional dating or relationship advice, Book a Session with me.