What Should I Do About My Professor?

What Should I Do About My Professor?

First and foremost, determine whether you legitimately like your professor or whether you are purely infatuated with him.

There is a difference and it can be very easy to get these two confused.

When you are infatuated with your professor, you rarely think about what he is like as a person.

Most of your focus is on what he can do for you and how good he can make you feel.

In other words, you are fixated on the pleasurable aspects of being with him.

You don’t consider his morality, the possibility that he has anger issues, or whether he has a lack of empathy for others.

This is what happens when you are infatuated.

You are immediately blinded by what you consider to be perfection before your very eyes.

You are blinded by how good that perfection makes you feel whenever you think about him or you are in his class.

On the flip side, when you candidly like him, you are extra cautious.

You wonder about what type of person he is when he is not in a class setting.

You are curious about how he interacts with his friends and family, and whether your friends and family would get along with his.

You are concerned about how he has treated people in his previous romantic relationships.

Was he kind and attentive to them?

Was he giving of his time?

Was he trustworthy and faithful?

These are the thoughts going through your mind when you legitimately like him as a person and wondering what it is like to date him.

You are not infatuated in this scenario.

You do think about the implications of his character.

You do consider what he is like as a person outside the academic arena.

You wonder whether you would get along with each other or how you would treat each other should a disagreement occur.

In other words, you think things through before you allow yourself to get carried away by your emotions.

Now, this being said, if you have come to terms with what you are truly feeling, we can proceed.

If you are merely infatuated with him, give this extra time.

Infatuations have a tendency to flame out quickly, having no real foundation to begin with.

An infatuation that persists is worth further analysis.

This is where you are looking at this professor as something more than eye candy.

This is when you act.

Your best option is to get him outside the class environment.

Start conversations with him after class and learn about what he loves to do or where he tends to go on the weekends.

Use this information as your guide.

If he tells you that he loves theater, learn more about theater on your personal time so that the next time you see him, you have something more to say about it.

This creates a connection with him.

This connection is what draws him towards you, enticing him to want to talk to you more often after class.

From here, he tells you about the next theater show that he intends to attend.

This is when it feels right to accept the invite or invite yourself.

Outside of the academic environment, he is more relaxed and open in discussion, and this improves the odds of having future romantic dates with him.

Your goal should be to meet with him as much as possible outside of the classroom environment.


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