As a rule of thumb, keep the first date to no more than an hour or two maximum.
You don’t want to get too much time invested in a first date when you are just getting to know each other.
You should want to leave room for hunger.
You want the person to be hungry to see you again in future dates.
They will want to talk more and perhaps do more.
This is when the dates can start getting longer.
This is when the chemistry is really beginning to set in and the need for more time together becomes more of a natural occurrence than a forced one.
Some people get worried that if they don’t have a first date that lasts for hours, somehow the date failed or they failed.
This is ill-conceived.
You are better off having a concise first date filled with great conversation and interaction that lasts an hour or two at the most than a four hour date filled with lulls in conversation and awkwardness.
There is an exception to this rule.
If the other person is having a lot of fun and you both don’t even realize how quick time has gone by, a four hour or more date can totally work.
It has worked because it naturally happened and you are both having a great time.
It wasn’t forced nor awkward.
However, you shouldn’t be stretching out the hours simply because you feel that if you don’t have these hours, the date isn’t full or is somehow not a real first date.
You will end up padding in more and more time simply because you are hoping that you give off the message about being serious about the first date.
However, all you may be doing is silently annoying your date who feels like you are taking more of their time than you should.
You may also be filling those extra hours with conversation that is going nowhere or activities that are too heavy or time consuming to have been partaken on a first date.
You may have even started the date great.
Your date may have been totally into you and what you were making them feel in that first hour or two.
The conversation was free flowing and fun. There may have even been some light flirting.
You were successful in truly whetting your date’s appetite for more.
However, you decided to take it too far by stretching the date for another unnecessary hour or more.
Now you have lost your date mentally and as they finally leave the interaction they aren’t in a happy place within.
They are telling themselves that they don’t want to have that experience again.
This is too bad because it had all started so well.
This is what you need to avoid. Forget about trying to impress your date by adding those hours.
Keep your first date relatively short, one to two hours, and sweet.
Give your date a reason to be excited to see you again.