How To Motivate My Boyfriend To Get A Job And Be Of Value

Unfortunately, you have been enabling your jobless boyfriend without realizing it, and that has to stop if there is any hope to galvanize your boyfriend to get a job.

How To Motivate My Boyfriend To Get A Job And Be Of ValueHe has to believe that getting a job is no longer an option but a must.

You have let him to get away with not being motivated enough to get a job, and made excuses for him.

He has convinced you in the past that he will try to get one but he never follows through.

You care about him and you take him at his word.

Yet, he always falls short of getting the job.

He flirts with getting one every time but something perennially comes up that leaves him without one.

He has gotten jobs in the past but they never lasted.

You would listen to his sob stories about how this or that person at work mistreats him and is such a jerk.

You feel sorry for him and subconsciously encourage him to quit so as to find something else that makes him happier.

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He has your vote of approval, so he he quits said job.

Unfortunately, it is the same story with the next job and the one after that and so on.

Recognize where you aided in facilitating this cycle of behavior with your boyfriend during the course of your relationship.

Making yourself aware of this keeps you from enabling him, so that you are no longer giving excuses for his behavior.

When you call him out on his laziness, you aren’t enabling him.

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When you don’t keep helping him out with his bills or buying him items, you aren’t enabling him.

He has to be brought to the reality of where you stand.

You stand in a position of strength, having displayed a reluctance to encourage his behavior.

Once he acknowledges he isn’t getting an easy pass like he used to, he is forced to take a closer look at his actions.

This forces him to own up to his responsibilities.

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When you go out on dates with him, you mustn’t continue paying for his end of it.

Let him pay his own way.

If this means that he gets to see you less because he can’t afford to go on dates with you, that is what has to happen.

You aren’t playing anymore.

He has to discern that you aren’t going to be sticking around for much longer as long as he continues behaving like this.

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Make plans with friends in the event he can’t pull his own weight on a night out.

The moment he realizes that he can be replaced, he is highly motivated to go get that job and keep it.

There are stakes and he knows that now.

In forcing him out of his comfort zone, you send the message that there are consequences for his actions.

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