If the girl is working on her laptop or reading something at Starbucks, a good way to talk to her is to introduce yourself and ask her about what she is working on.
Be polite and kind. The idea is to make her feel comfortable. This means that you should watch your body language.
You can smile as you talk to her and lean in closer but not too close.
When she responds, you could reach out your hand for a handshake while asking her what her name is.
If she shakes your hand, you have created a physical connection.
When she gives you her response, you could follow up by relating to what she said in some way.
You would have to be smart about it.
If she were to tell you that she is working on her sociology project, you could tell her something related to that.
Perhaps you almost took sociology but decided to take a different subject instead.
You may ask her about it and whether she enjoys it.
From here, don’t be afraid to sit in front of her or by her side.
Just allow the conversation to flow.
Don’t feel like you are intruding, you really aren’t.
Oftentimes, people just want a break from what they are doing.
They just want something to take their mind away from their work for a few minutes.
A few minutes is key.
Don’t overstay your welcome.
Get her to talk to you for a few minutes and just leave it at that.
Let her know that you are glad that she took the time to talk to you and you would like to talk to her again.
This is typically when she will give you her number if you struck her interest.
In a different scenario, if the girl at Starbucks just happens to be in line for a beverage, you could talk to her by asking her about what she is about to order.
When she tells you what it is, you could ask her if it is any good and whether she thinks you should order the same thing.
In this instance, you are trying to get her opinion about something and her recommendation.
This is loosening her up because she gets to think about something pleasant.
Plus, if she were to recommend the same to you, she would be creating a connection with you.
You could take her recommendation and introduce yourself in the process.
Once she tells you what her name is, you could follow up by asking her a little bit about herself.
Is she going to school? Working?
On a break?
This is what will help to start opening up conversation.
By the time she reaches the front counter, you may have already learned quite a bit about her.
Let her place her order.
Once you have placed yours and you are both waiting, ask her for her number.
If she has enjoyed her conversation with you, she will give it.
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