A girl who is warm one day and slightly standoffish the next day is playing a game with you.

She is gauging how interested you are in her and how much you are ready to tolerate.

Some girls play this game to maintain an upper hand.

It’s a desire to have control.

This protects her emotionally.

Such control means she knows what to expect from you.

She knows that in consistently doing this, you keep asking questions.

Her warmth one day and standoffishness the next day is having such a profound effect on you, she is encouraged to carry on with it.

It’s strange to you that she is acting like she barely knows you today when just yesterday she was taking your calls and flirting with you.

She knows you have these questions in your mind.

And as long as you keep asking them, she is encouraged to keep doing what she is doing.

Her span of control over your thoughts and emotions isn’t relegated to when she is in your physical presence.

She knows that your emotions are in chaos when she isn’t present either.

This chaos in your mind forces you to work harder to appease her.

Suddenly, you are calling and texting a bit too much, desperate to hear her voice.

When she doesn’t respond, you are desperately watching her on social media to see what she is up to, or talking to mutual friends in the hopes of getting word about why she is behaving like this.

You don’t realize it, but with each desperate attempt to get her to talk to you or give you her attention, you are falling into her trap.

That web of control she is intent on building is in motion.

Not until she feels safe enough about your dedication to her is she prepared to act better.

Once this is reached, her behavior changes.

She is being warm and less standoffish.

Her confidence that she has enough control over her relationship with you has solidified, and she deems that opening herself up to you and being consistent in her behavior is of minimum or no risk.

Sometimes, a girl never comes around to being consistent in her behavior.

For some girls, the act of being warm one day and standoffish the next is their intent on generating control over a guy, without the intent of ever changing their behavior.

For her, the control feeds into her ego and that alone is enough for her.

The risk of finally letting her guard down is too great.

She wasn’t always like this.

There was a time she was warm and loving, never standoffish.

A guy she loved took advantage of her love, giving her very little in return for the abundant love she showed him.

Inevitably, he left her with a broken heart.

Never again.

Whenever she drives a guy into chaos by being warm one day and standoffish the next, she is exerting revenge on the guy who hurt her in the past when her heart was so open to love.

Never again.