Many people get hurt in relationships.
It isn’t an occurrence that is uniquely your experience.
Getting hurt is part of the risk we take when we get into relationships, and this hurt is somewhat inevitable for many of us.
Your focal point mustn’t be on why you always get hurt.
This has the effect of a self-fulfilling prophecy where you enter every new relationship with fear and trepidation, preemptively jeopardizing the relationship by so doing.
It’s fear and anxiety that keeps you from fully trusting your partner.
Trust is infectious.
When you trust your partner, they are inclined to trust you.
A partner who senses that you don’t trust them, is a partner who is vastly uncomfortable.
Such discomfort leads a partner into doubting the fortitude of the relationship.
It is like the relationship has no foundation and is on shaky ground.
This fear and anxiety alone leads your partner to either end the relationship prematurely or cheat.
The more obsessed you are with the fear of being hurt, the more you increase the likelihood that you get hurt.
Remember that humans are incredibly emotional and perceptive beings.
A partner senses your unease.
When you are not at ease about them, they aren’t at ease about you and the relationship wobbles in tandem.
Wholly trusting a partner in a relationship is scary, but this is the risk we assume when we get into relationships.
In deciding to get into a committed relationship with someone, you have made a commitment to love and trust your partner.
Think about how you feel about a close family member.
You love and trust that family member with all your heart.
You give them the benefit of the doubt because of the connection you have with them as family.
Does this mean that said family member never hurts you?
Sure they do.
Yet, you know that family member has your back no matter what.
The love and trust you have for a romantic partner bears the same tenors.
It isn’t perfect and there are moments when they surely hurt you, but in the end, they are there for you no matter what.
Trust is vulnerability.
A relationship without trust doesn’t work.
This means both parties are vulnerable.
It’s par for the course.
To mitigate the risk, take your time to get to know a potential partner while dating in the early stages.
Get around their family and friends so that you receive varied accounts of what this person is about and what their history in relationships has been like.
There is no rush.
Sometimes, people are too quick to rush into relationships out of fear or desire.
Think about it this way.
Meeting the right person for you means you have the rest of your life to share with them.
Taking a little longer to get to know them before committing is a very small price to pay for a lifetime of companionship.