Should You Get Back To Someone That You Can’t Trust Anymore?

Share This Post

Should You Get Back To Someone That You Can't Trust Anymore?

If you were to get back with this someone, what are the chances that they will betray your trust again?

Human beings are truly creatures of habit.

We tend to do what makes us comfortable and go back to it again and again.

It really takes a person that is very intent on changing themselves to get to a level where you may entertain the idea of trusting them.

Has this person truly shown you that they are intent on changing themselves?

Need Advice? - Book A Dating Coach

What have they done to move themselves toward that achievement?

Simply telling you that they have changed or they are sorry isn’t good enough.

Words are just that, “words.”

Only action and history will truly tell you if this is someone that you can come to trust again.

Your best route of action is vigilance and patience.

Need Advice? - Book A Dating Coach

You have to have the patience to observe this person.

It can be very easy to accept what the person tells you.

You may have feelings for them and you really want things to work.

You really want to trust this person again.

However, instead of listening to their words, observe their actions.

Need Advice? - Book A Dating Coach

When you notice patterns of changed behavior that is leading towards trust, you will know.

A big mistake that many people in your position make is not giving it time.

They jump right back into trusting this person when this person actually hasn’t proven themselves sincere.

You have to let them show you that they mean it.

You should observe their behavior, not only with you, but with others as well.

Need Advice? - Book A Dating Coach

If this person is truly sincere about wanting to be trustworthy again, their acts towards others should reflect that.

If the only time that they are trying to be trustworthy is when they are around you, they are not being sincere.

Developing trust in oneself and in one’s acts requires a lifestyle change.

It requires a different way and mode about going about your daily life.

It isn’t something that is rationed off to a particular person.

Need Advice? - Book A Dating Coach

For someone to be truly trustworthy, trust has to emanate from all facets of their life.

They should have trustworthy relationships with family members, friends, acquaintances, business contacts and so on.

Their life should be about honing these relationships in a dignified manner.

There is no picking and choosing here.

To really know that this person can be trusted again, you should observe all of their relationships.

Need Advice? - Book A Dating Coach

Then and only then can you begin to surmise if indeed this person is worthy to be trusted again.

At this point, you will have a sense of where you should go with this.

If you were to feel like this person is truly making an effort after having observed their relationships with both you and others over a sustained period of time, you may begin to let your connection with them grow.

Don’t jump right back into a relationship with this person though.

Start off slow and easy.

Need Advice? - Book A Dating Coach

Allow the relationship to move in whatever direction it’s going to go in a natural way.

You may find that you are better off just being friends with this person.

You may also find that the romantic spark is back.

Either way, it is important to use vigilance and patience before allowing yourself to trust this person again.

010By Luke Iwuji, a dating coach and founder of DatingLogic.net. For the best professional dating or relationship advice, Book a Session with me.