Am I Too Nice? How Do You Know When You Are Being Used?

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Am I Too Nice? How Do You Know When You Are Being Used?

When you feel exactly the way you feel right now, let your instincts be your guide.

If you are feeling like you are being used, you probably are.

When you get this type of feeling, it is very important for you to take a step back.

Try to evaluate the situation and ask yourself why you are feeling this way.

There is someone that is making you feel this way and there is a reason for it.

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If you are constantly helping this person out with no reciprocation on their part, you are probably being used.

If you are constantly accommodating your life and time for this person in order to make their life easier and they rarely ever acknowledge it or give back, you are probably being used.

Again, let your instincts be your guide.

As human beings we are born with instinct.

Instinct doesn’t only guide our need to procreate or protect, it also guides our sense of intuition.

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It may not always be right but it does allow you to have cause to take a pause and assess a particular situation.

When was the last time this person did something good to you or for you?

When was the last time they invited you to do something with them and paid your way instead of the other way around?

When was the last time they patiently listened to you as you tried to get through a difficult emotional period in your life?

Try to be honest with yourself as you think this through.

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When was the last time they put in a good word about you to their friends and acquaintances?

When was the last time they defended your character?

If it is hard for you to come up with these instances, you may be getting used.

These instances should not be hard for you to recollect.

If you find it easier to recollect instances when you have done this as opposed to them, you have cause for concern.

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Being nice isn’t a bad thing.

However, the problem arises when you think that being nice is all about making someone else’s life more convenient than your own.

This is where some nice people go wrong.

They start to believe that in order for them to be liked, they have to inconvenience themselves or do more than they should in order to make someone else’s life better.

Oftentimes, this is also done in order to be accepted or be seen as an equal.

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Unfortunately, this tends to have the opposite effect when you meet unsavory individuals who know how to take advantage of nice people such as yourself.

Try to understand your worth. You deserve to be treated with respect and deference just as you do others.

You have to understand your value and why it is just as deserving of attention as anyone else’s.

Avoid taking things too far.

If you are feeling like you are being used, take a step back and stop what you are doing. Let this other person step up and do something kind for you.

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Not once. Not twice. Several times.

You need to see that they are genuine.

Only one or two acts of kindness compared to your hundreds simply won’t measure up.

There is nothing wrong with being nice.

You just have to start allowing yourself to be loved and treated with respect as well.

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It’s time for you to take a step back and let this person start showing you their true authenticity.

If they are unwilling to reciprocate on an equal level, you may want to be rid of this person and move on to more positive relationships.

It wouldn’t benefit you if you were to expend more and more energy on someone who is unwilling to reciprocate.

To do so would only get you to a point where you become mentally exasperated which could then affect how you interact with other people in your life.