If you are not attracted to him but you feel like a horrible person, you should understand that as human beings we can be very sentimental.
Sometimes, that sense of sentimentally makes us believe that we owe someone our favor.
This is very misguided and can put you on the wrong path.
A path that can even be confusing. It certainly isn’t the way you should go about entering your relationships.
You should understand that you have to be okay with wanting to make yourself happy.
You have to be okay with the fact that you are important.
If you weren’t happy, how would you be able to give the best of you to a lover, a friend, your family or society.
Your happiness is indeed important and there is nothing wrong with wanting that in your life.
Where you go wrong is when you believe that by not being attracted to him, you are being horrible or cruel.
You cannot like everyone.
That is quite impossible.
There are always going to be people that you simply don’t find attractive and there is nothing wrong with that.
It doesn’t make you a horrible person.
If everyone was attracted to everyone, the world would not have particularly positive relationships.
The fact that we tend to be picky as a species is what allows us to try to better ourselves.
If we knew that all we had to do was just be and everyone would be attracted to us, we would rarely put out any effort to make us better or even value our relationships.
Hence, it is natural to be picky and it can also be a very good thing in this world.
You have to understand that you do not owe him anything.
If you were to pretend that you were attracted to him, you would only lead him on and make things worse.
You have got to value the fact that you know what you are attracted to and are willing to wait for that to come along.
That is what matters.
How you feel inside.
Trying to make this guy who you aren’t attracted to feel good just so that you don’t feel bad would only make you feel worse.
At some point in time, you will fully acknowledge that you are leading him on and you will feel trapped.