Should I Message Her Or Wait For Her To Do Something?

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It depends on how you have been interacting with her so far.

It’s best to message her if you haven’t been communicating with her all that much or you haven’t been consistent with your communication thus far.

In the initial stages of dating, most girls would rather the guy do most of the initiating when it comes to communication just so that she knows that he is truly serious and also to feel as though she is desired.

Hence, if you have been sending very sporadic messages, she may not be entirely sure of your motives and thereby may be playing it safe by not being as forthcoming with messaging you.

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You should be proactive in dating.

If you were to just wait for her to do something, you could be waiting for a very long time.

Just understand that she most likely wants you to show her that you are truly interested and thereby she is going to test you by observing how frequently you message her.

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Now, that being said, you shouldn’t keep messaging her if you have been putting out a lot of effort in doing so in the past few weeks and she barely reciprocates or it takes her a long time to get back with you.

She has to be playing her part as well.

If she expects you to be doing the majority of the initiating, she should still be willing to respond in a timely fashion in order to show you that she is truly interested as well.

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If she hasn’t been responding in a timely fashion and she tends to get back with you when she feels like it, almost as though you are some kind of inconvenience in her life, you shouldn’t message her.

In this scenario, you also shouldn’t wait for her to do something.

By her behaving in this way, she is either showing you that she is not interested or that she simply enjoys playing games.

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You have to look back on how your interaction with her has been thus far and ask yourself whether it seems like you have been putting out so much effort and she has been barely responding to those efforts.

If that is the case and you feel like you have essentially been pushing a big rock up a mountain, you should abandon your correspondence with her and move on.

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So many guys can get so caught up in wooing a girl that they don’t see what is right in front of them.

She may give him some crumbs of hope here and there by being flirtatious and playful. However, the majority of the time, he may be fighting an uphill battle just to have a meaningful and extended conversation with her or to get her to go out on a date.

He hears excuse after excuse or she may even tell him that she will be there for the date but ultimately doesn’t show up.

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Amid all this, some of these guys continue anyway because they simply hold on to those fleeting moments when the girl was responsive to them.

You shouldn’t be that guy.

You should be able to assess your situation with this girl. Evaluate how much effort you have been putting out versus how much she has been giving back.

Based on that, you should objectively know whether it is best to stay on and message this girl or whether you are better off moving on.

Related Video

Why Is It So Hard To Find A Girl That Messages First?


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Luke is a relationship consultant and founder of He is the author of several insightful and eye-opening eBooks about dating and relationships.

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